dailyprompt

Less selfishness

~ MaryG ~ 16 Comments

What’s one thing that would instantly improve your city?

We’re having high suburban drama here in my leafy suburb outside of Boston over…trash.

Due to budget constraints and a failed vote to raise our own taxes, the town has implemented a new trash policy whereby every family gets one small trash bin. (Recycling bins are separate.)

It’s proving to be very dramatic and upsetting to a lot of people. If you fill your bin and still have more trash, you have to buy special $15 bags to dispose of the rest.

Since my husband and I are empty nesters, we can deal. For families with young children, disposable diapers alone would fill up about half of these little bins. It’s an actual hardship for them.

In the grand scheme of things, this is a relatively minor problem, but it’s also just another way we’re making life harder for young families.

Conservatives say they want more babies and growing families, yet they continually vote down money to pay for schools and other services that families need.

Typical post in a town Facebook group that elicited 100+ comments and devolved into several online fights
Typical comment from a white guy who thinks he shouldn’t have to contribute to the community because he has no family of his own (gee, I wonder why?) I mean, he doesn’t even “USE THE ROADS.” Maybe he has a Jetsons-style space saucer to get around.

Readers of The Wall Street Journal

~ MaryG ~ 9 Comments

How does your mindset affect your financial success?

One thing that people who are on the other side of the political spectrum from me (my father for one) love to say is that there’s no other country in the world where people can just “have an idea” and make millions of dollars. They say that’s a uniquely American thing.

Here’s an article from the Wall Street Journal that doubles down on this idea that America is great because anyone who works hard can get rich. I’ve also noticed that these same people tend to say Europe is poor and declining. “They don’t even realize how poor they are,” I heard one Conservative acquaintance (another white man) say.

I’m all for people working hard and doing well as a result, but this idea that everyone should just “have an idea” (like opening a hot dog stand) and through sheer grit and a positive attitude make a fortune seems…naive. And also, given who tends to espouse it, the height of privilege.

The Great Elephant Migration

~ MaryG ~ 28 Comments

If your pet an elephant could talk, what would be the first thing it says?

100 life-size elephant sculptures, each hand-carved from the invasive plant lantana camara by roughly 300 Indigenous artisans from India’s Nilgiri Hills and modeled after real, named elephants, are on display for free along Boston’s Commonwealth Avenue Mall. They’re all facing in the same direction—moving as a herd down Comm Ave.

So, what would they say? Thinking…

Maybe, “stick together – we’re all we’ve got”

Independent People

~ MaryG ~ 22 Comments
Daily writing prompt
Have you ever regretted reading a book — which one and why?
View all responses

Once, for my Book Group, I selected a classic that was highly recommended by the author Ann Patchett on the Instagram account of her Nashville bookstore—Parnassus Books. The book is called Independent People by the Icelandic author Halldór Laxness. It was written a long time ago and considered a seminal work. It led to the author getting a Pulitzer Prize.

It was awful. Nobody in my book group made it through to the end, but I felt like I HAD to finish it, because I chose it.

I’ve mostly blocked it out, but let’s just say I know more about sheep and their various disgusting ailments than I ever wanted to and Iceland is permanently OFF my Bucket List. 😉

The Boston Masshole

~ MaryG ~ 29 Comments

What’s the most annoying trope in books or movies?

Listen, one thing I know about is Massholes. I grew up with plenty of them. I know when the accent is real.

In movies, they never get it right. Even Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, who grew up in highbrow Cambridge, don’t get it quite right. (Despite that slight flaw, I loved the film Good Will Hunting. It captured one of the key characteristics of Masshole mentality—class awareness. “You think you’re bettah than me cuz you go to Hah-vahd? Well Faaaack you”)

Mark Wahlberg, on the other hand, is an objectively terrible actor, but an authentic Boston Masshole. Did you know he grew up in the infamous South Boston “projects” and was involved in a number of serious racially-motivated assaults and harassment incidents as a teenager in Boston during the mid-1980s? I did! He’s the type of guy I would’ve avoided like the plague in high school.

This is a famous image by Stanley Forman. Titled “The Soiling of Old Glory,” the photo won a Pulitzer Prize for breaking news photography. Forman took the picture on April 5, 1976, for what was then the Boston Herald American. A young white man lunges at a black man (Ted Landsmark) with the sharp point of a flagpole, with the American flag attached.

Well, this is all a long-winded way of saying that I finally saw an authentic portrait of that trope last night. The film Tony about one summer in the life of the late celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain has a great Masshole character played by Leo Woodall. He’s SO good in this. In my opinion, he steals the film, which is largely set on Cape Cod in the summer of 1975. His accent and demeanor are perfect. It just figures that he’s a Brit! He totally nailed his part. GENXers should go see the film for Woodall and the soundtrack (including some classic Jonathan Richman) alone.

Leo Woodall as the Masshole character—a restaurant worker named Sal—in Tony (in theaters now)
Here’s me at a dinner with Ted Landsmark (from the Pulitzer Prize winning photo) in 2013. It was an honor to meet such a distinguished Bostonian.

A Jackson

~ MaryG ~ 19 Comments

What’s the best thing you’ve ever found randomly on the street?

Money. That’s the most exciting thing I’ve ever found in the street. I don’t think I ever found more than $20, but one time a twenty-dollar bill floated right in front of me in the ocean. It glided by on a gentle wave. Turns out that a wet twenty needs to dry out in the sun, but then it works just like a regular twenty. 😉

Quick update on the fruit trees—the fruit picking tool arrived! And there’s plenty of fruit left out there. The squirrels are still MIA.

My second Winesap apple pie of the year just came out of the oven. I’m using the recipe on a ceramic pie plate that I’ve had for at least twenty years. I believe my mother got it at a “garage sale” for me.

So maybe this pie plate is a better answer to the prompt. Around here, “Garage sales” typically take place on the street in front of the home.

The best laid plans

~ MaryG ~ 17 Comments

How do you deal with uncertainty?

Clearly not very well, based on yesterday’s post, which I have since deleted because it was so whiny. (Turns out I got all the information I needed about the out-of-town wedding later that day.)

As Tina of A Midlife Adventure once noted that one of the good outcomes of COVID is that nearly all travel plans are cancellable these days. I’ve had to cancel both my Dance Camp and Acadia National Park trips because I have developed plantar fasciitis in my left heel. It started after my Circle Dance in June. I was wearing cheap shoes and we did a flat-footed dance and I think I just stomped too hard for too long. I’m finally getting physical therapy for it, but I can’t walk very far at the moment.

Life is totally uncertain. Everyone knows this, but people over 60 really know it. Sadly, we all have close friends and family members who have died. I guess the main things you can do in the face of uncertainty are: 1) Breathe; 2) Gather as much information as you can about the issue at hand (burying your head in the sand rarely helps); and 3) Don’t get too attached to your plans!

Fine dining in Boston

~ MaryG ~ 13 Comments

Which is the best restaurant in your city?

For the purposes of this prompt, I’m going to claim Boston as “my” city, even though I live about 20 miles northwest in suburbia.

And the winner is:

Deuxave

Wonderful food

Classy, intimate atmosphere

Great service

Terrific location in Boston’s most beautiful neighborhood—the Back Bay—at the corner of two of Boston’s most iconic streets: Massachusetts and Commonwealth Avenues, thus the name. DeuxAve (get it? French for two avenues)

If you’re coming to Boston and you want to splurge on fine dining ($$$), I recommend a meal at Deuxave.

My family and me in the bar at Deuxave on my 50th birthday (11 years ago). The restaurant has been in business since 2010.

Eldest Daughter Syndrome

~ MaryG ~ 16 Comments

If you had a time machine and could send just one message to your past self, what would it say?

I don’t know if everyone knows this or not, but there’s an entire corner of the internet dedicated to “Eldest Daughter Syndrome.” It seems like it applies largely to immigrant families where the oldest daughters and/or oldest granddaughters get stuck with a LOT, like becoming the family’s default adult long before they’re actually adults, translating for parents, managing paperwork and appointments, mediating conflicts, supervising younger siblings, and generally absorbing emotional labor that “should” belong to a parent. The pattern often continues into adulthood.

Now, I’m not saying I had to do any of that really hard stuff. (I’m a third generation immigrant. My parents were both born here and did fine. My grandfather was born in Italy and died young, and my grandmother was illiterate in both English and Italian, although she spoke and understood English just fine.) Still, I do relate a bit to the Eldest Daughter problems that other women describe. Being the oldest, I think I tried too hard to please my parents. I cared too much what they thought. As I’ve mentioned many times, I was raised Catholic. I think I took the fifth commandment “Honor thy Mother and Father” too seriously. I tried too hard to be perfect — for them. Also, I was made to feel responsible for some of my sister’s problems, which were completely beyond my control.

So, I guess my message to my younger self would be, don’t worry so much about what Mom and Dad think, especially Dad. It’s OK to disappoint them. You do you.

Perfect me with my father and sister on my First Communion day. That dumb veil pinched my head so much.

Books

~ MaryG ~ 22 Comments

Which author would you love to have dinner with?

The two novelists I follow on Instagram are living legends—one American and one Canadian. Ideally, I’d have dinner with both of them and silently listen to them talk to each other.

*Barbara Kingsolver, 71, is an acclaimed American novelist known for works like The Poisonwood Bible, The Bean Trees, and Demon Copperhead, blending rich storytelling with themes of social justice, family, and the environment. She’s the first author to win the Women’s Prize for Fiction twice (for The Lacuna and Demon Copperhead), and Demon Copperhead also earned her the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction in 2023.

*Margaret Atwood, 86, is a celebrated Canadian novelist known for works like The Handmaid’s Tale, Cat’s Eye, and Oryx and Crake, blending speculative and dystopian fiction with feminist themes and sharp social commentary. She’s won the Booker Prize twice (for The Blind Assassin and The Testaments) and remains one of the most influential English-language authors of her generation.

(*Bios by Claude)

Speaking of contemporary fiction, I highly recommend Absolution by Alice McDermott.

Really good!