Your tone

~ MaryG
Daily writing prompt
Do you remember life before the internet?
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As one of the oldest GenXers, I’ve had the internet for just about half of my life, so I remember pre-internet life quite well.

The turning point was around the time I got married—in 1993. I planned the entire wedding and honeymoon without the internet. Imagine that. I had books, a work friend who loved weddings, Bride magazine, a landline, and my mother as my main resources.

As a courtesy to my mother, I called my childhood Catholic church to inquire about getting married there. At that time, my future husband and I were already living together, which is considered to be “the sin of adultery” in the Catholic Church. The fact that we were cohabitating was clear from the greeting on our answering machine.

Well, the very sound of the priest’s condescending voice on my answering machine when he returned my call sent me straight to the Unitarian church down the street. And that’s where we ended up getting married.

Before the internet, the human voice and all its various inflections, mattered more than they do now. There were no emojis, only “your tone” — and I did not like Father Sheehan’s tone.

Image from Pexels

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I’d rather laugh with the sinners

19 thoughts on “Your tone”

  1. It’s sad bc they wonder why church attendance is falling but then get all petty about nothing – living together and planning a wedding date is a million miles away from just living together. The commitment is there!

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    1. Frankly, the Catholic Church had already lost me way before then. I was just trying to make my mom happy, by giving them a call. The bitchy priest was just the final push I needed to get out for good. No regrets!

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  3. It’s likely due to one incredibly condescending meeting that I didn’t convert to Catholicism when it would have helped my relationship with my in-laws so much, to do so. Neither here nor there at this point, but just so you know I could imagine the tone quite well. 🙂

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    1. I bet you could! Another priest, who was an admissions officer at Holy Cross College, had used a similar tone with me when I was looking at schools and sent me running from all Catholic/Jesuit universities forever. I wouldn’t even let my kids apply to any.

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      3. I remember my mother-in-law, who found offense and all kinds of small things, saying then “Everyone makes mistakes…”

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  4. Very clever and very true – voice and tone. That’s really interesting. For the longest time, I’d write emails without the thought of tone. I had the tone in my head and figured they got the gist. Later, I reread my emails and considered it from the other side. I learned just because I hear my voice in my head, the tone did not translate in my words (I almost said “on paper”). I needed to learn to communicate differently. Great post today!

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    1. Thank you! So true about emails, and also now, texting. My kids seem to add “lol” to the end of virtually every message. It seems like they do it as a way of “sounding” more friendly.

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