Are you retired?

~ MaryG
Daily writing prompt
What is one question you hate to be asked? Explain.
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Having recently been through a bunch of toxic workplace bullshit that resulted in me resigning my position a couple years earlier than originally planned, I’m not loving the question, “So, are you retired now?”

I mean, yeah, I guess I am. I can afford to stop working for money now. But it does feel unusual and rather lazy, when nearly every other able-bodied person my age is still working full-time.

I know, I know. This is a First World problem that I’m lucky to have.

If I answer unenthusiastically, “yeah, I guess so,” sometimes I get “oh, I only ask because you look too young to be retired,” which is 100% the correct way to recover from asking me the question in the first place. Playing to someone’s vanity, when put your foot in your mouth, can work quite well.

Selfie, March 2023

The one question that is truly non-recoverable from, if you ask the wrong woman, is: “when are you due?” Just don’t. Ever.

19 thoughts on “Are you retired?”

  1. I also retired early. A toxic workplace with bad management played a hand in my early exit, I miss the job, not most of the people. Great answer!

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    1. Thank you! I was getting a bit tired of the job, but the people were great. I miss almost all of them – except one. I hope you’re enjoying this phase of your life. I’m still figuring mine out.

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  2. Yeah, I understand the feeling. I’ve been sitting here wondering why I have this reaction to the question. Maybe because I didn’t leave on my own terms. Your last comment made me laugh! I had a friend ask someone that question. His friendship with her never was quite the same.

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    1. “Retired” just has a weird connotation. We need a different word. And yes, assuming someone is pregnant, based on appearance, is a faux-pas that does permanent damage. Oof. I’ve witnessed it too.

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  6. After having survived a few toxic work environments and some great work ones too, my advice would be to say, “hell yea, I’m retired.” Ha, ha, you have nothing to feel awkward about. Many people wish they were in your position. I have a few years to go yet, but someday I hope to get to where you are. I would switch the question around: are you happy and having fun? That’s what’s important. Good for you Mary.

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    1. Thanks Brian! I know I’m very lucky to have this option before age 60, but it still feels a bit like shirking. I’m having some fun, but could be having more. I need my husband and the rest of my old friends to join me. My new friends are mostly 10+ years older than me. We talk about hearing aids and stuff like that. lol

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  7. I retired, by choice, at 58 and have never been happier nor as busy. There are no thoughts that I am wasting the days away and I often think of the previous generation who worked all their lives only to drop dead months after retirement. Life is for living, not working your butt off. There comes a time when you’ve simply earned “your time”. I now have the energy to focus on my passions : promoting a love of literacy, travel within my own country, study, theatre, growing plants to fundraise for charity. This year I am focussing on creating an online study program for those disadvantaged by isolation. Off to a music festival this weekend. Just loving it!

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