personal

Duck, Cover and Recirculate

~ MaryG ~ 1 Comment

Create an emergency preparedness plan.

I once told a friend that, in the event of a nuclear attack on Boston, my plan was to put the kids in the minivan, hit “recirculate” on the a/c, and drive west. Surely, “recirculate” would keep the radiation out of our air supply. She laughed.

By the way, I did not enjoy the film “Oppenheimer.” It’s too long and confusing and mostly about politics. I couldn’t keep all the white guys straight. I thought it would have been better as a miniseries, with new characters rolled out each week. The blast scene was cool though. Terrifyingly cool.

Yeah, no I don’t think so

~ MaryG ~ 1 Comment
Daily writing prompt
What do you think gets better with age?

Your ability to say “no” gets better with age. Pleasing people (parents, teachers, bosses) seems so important when you’re young, especially to oldest daughters. Being “nice” is paramount, and nice people don’t say no. The older I get, the more free I feel to decline that invitation to travel with someone who irks me, join a potentially contentious or time-consuming church committee, or even take on a work assignment that’s outside my job descripton. I’d rather be kind than nice, if you know what I mean.

Flowers I sent to myself

Accepting AARP

~ MaryG ~ Leave a comment

According to Wikipedia, AARP (formerly called the American Association of Retired Persons) is an “interest group” in the United States focusing on issues affecting those over the age of fifty. It seems that every single American gets an AARP promotional mailing on or near their 50th birthday. It’s like a rite of passage. You get it, you open it, you groan (why are they ruining your birthday?) and you toss it as quickly as possible. But they do NOT relent. They keep sending you mail every six months or so.

Well, sometime between 57 and 58, I gave in. One of the mailings mentioned car rental discounts and I needed to rent a car, so I joined. The offer was $45 for a 5-year membership for me and my husband. (Later I got $8 back for paying with my Bank of America card.) Immediately upon joining, I saved $400 on a weeklong car rental. Why did I resist this for so long? (Because it’s for old people – duh!)

My husband has not yet accepted his membership. (He doesn’t want them to have his e-mail.) A friend asked if it was possible to access the discounts without actually saying the word “senior.” Another said they might join when they hit 60. Granted AARP does send a LOT of emails, but I’ve come to realize that joining 38 million other Americans as an AARP member is a way of accepting that I’m not alone and I’m not special. I can benefit from basic health, wellness, finance, and travel trips just like everybody else. (No, I did not realize that I should be getting 25 grams of protein per meal, including breakfast. And yes, I would like to see a list of the quaintest small towns in New England. Thank you!)

One of the things I was recently reminded of by an expert in AARP’s free, interactive “Staying Sharp” app is that you can cultivate positive emotions – like awe. Joining AARP can feel like giving up on your younger self, but there’s beauty in accepting the inevitability of aging. You’re just like everybody else. You’re basic – and you’re beautiful.

Two More Weeks

~ MaryG ~ 4 Comments

Two more weeks until Election Day. I can’t believe it’s been FOUR years since Pantsuit Nation got the crushing news that America is way WAY more racist and misogynistic than we thought. (It turns out Black people were already well aware of this and were not terribly surprised that the pussy-grabbing reality TV star won, but it sure was a massive shock to the rest of us.)

So, here we are, after 7 months of COVID-19 lockdown with 220,000+ dead and no end in sight. We all want Trump to lose by a HUGE margin, so that he won’t be able to dispute the results and start a Civil War. We need the Senate too, especially now that the Supreme Court will be so conservative. (Amy Coney Barrett terrifies me even more than Brett “I like beer” Kavanaugh, because I think she’s smart and her worldview was formed in some sort of extreme Catholic sect.)

I’ve already voted, sent postcards to swing state voters, annoyed my social media friends with numerous political posts, and made sure my kids and their friends got registered to vote. I’ve taken action on local legislation that will hopefully protect my state if Roe v Wade gets overturned. I even went to Town Meeting to vote for a Climate Action Resolution. It really feels like there’s nothing left to do but wait and worry.

Sometimes I think it helps to imagine the worst, so you can let it go—like writing a letter that you’ll never send. (Picture the worst.) OK, that just can’t happen.

Postcards to Florida Democrats

Why Blog?

~ MaryG ~ 10 Comments

I’ve periodically kept diaries and journals over the years.  (I have a whole crate of them in the attic.)  At one point, in my 30s, I read through them all in an attempt to figure out my own personal “theology.”  (I did this for a class led by a minister at my Unitarian Universalist church.)

One embarrassing thing that I had forgotten about myself became clear as I read through those old journals: I was a cheater.  I had been caught numerous times in school passing notes or looking at other people’s papers.  Ouch!

Another thing I learned/remembered was that there was one song that had made a particularly big impression on me.  Billy Joel’s “Only the Good Die Young,” which was released in 1978, basically became my life’s permission slip to blow-off some of the more restrictive tenants of the Catholic Church.  (Google the lyrics and imagine yourself a heretofore “nice” Catholic teenager.)

So why blog?  I mean…it’s public.  Why not just keep journaling – in private?

I guess the answer for me is permanence and connection.

All my old journals could easily get tossed out in the next move, or ruined by the next interior water mishap…or God forbid, burned in a fire.  (Our attic, home of my old box of journals, narrowly escaped a lightning strike last year!  See photo.)  If you put your thoughts on-line, they’re basically permanent.  I realize I may come to regret that, but at the moment I like the idea of having some sort of permanent record that I existed and had thoughts.

The idea that someone else might read my blog, and perhaps relate to it in some way, is also appealing.  As someone who was born and came of age in the pre-internet world, it sometimes seems sad that people are now so glued to their various screens.  Still, I’ve come to understand that meaningful human interaction and connection can and does happen on-line.  Some people seem to find great joy sharing their lives on Facebook and other social media.  I thought blogging might be like that, but with just a bit more room to expand.

Lightening strike
My son in front of a tree that was struck by lightning in our front yard in August 2015.

 

Flu Fail

~ MaryG ~ Leave a comment

For several years now, I have been getting a flu “shot” in the fall and it seems to be working. I haven’t had the flu, or even a bad winter cold, for years. I’m a believer. I love vaccines! But here’s the thing: I haven’t actually been getting a flu SHOT. I’ve been getting a flu MIST. It’s this nice, gentle, needle-free spray in each nostril. They give you a tissue afterwards. You go home. You don’t get the flu.

Last year, when I was 49, I knew it was going to be my last easy mist. You see, they only give the mist to people who are UNDER 50. I don’t know why. It seems like a silly rule. And I’ve been thinking about how to get around it for a whole year.

When flu clinic day arrived at my local library, I had a brilliant idea. I’d lie. So simple! I’d just write the wrong birth year on the form. If they asked for ID (highly unlikely), I’d say I left my license in a different purse. I can stay 49 as long as I want! My husband approved of my plan. (He said he had an aunt who had stayed 29 for years.)

Unfortunately, I never got to try my plan at the clinic because they were not giving the mist to anyone over 18 that day. They said it was in short supply. (Saving the good stuff for the kids I guess.) But I didn’t give up. I went to the pharmacy at Target and asked if they had the mist. “Plenty of mist,” they said. Yay! I filled out a form (listing my birth year as 1966, instead of 1965) and gave it to the pharmacist with my insurance card. He told me to go shop and then come back and they’d have my mist ready for me.

I felt uneasy about the lie while I was shopping. Unlike the health clinic at the library, Target has computers. Would they figure out I was over 49? I had never been to that pharmacy before. Maybe it wouldn’t come up…

When I got back to the pharmacy, the pharmacist asked me to confirm my date of birth. I lied again…verbally this time, which felt worse than accidentally-on-purpose lying on paper. Then the pharmacy technician piped in, “well, your insurance keeps coming up 1965.” I caved immediately. “Alright” I said, “I was born in 1965. I’m 50. I lied because I want the mist, not the shot.” The pharmacist was very sympathetic and even tried to think of a way around the rule for me, but there was no way around it. It was a shot or nothing.

I opted for nothing. Lame, I know. But I wanted the MIST goddammit. And I’m only 50.