What are your family’s top 3 favorite meals?
I make a pie that can be eaten for breakfast, dessert or snack. It was a hit at Thanksgiving yesterday and my son just had some for breakfast. I recommend buying some whip cream to spray on individual slices. (I like it better than the traditional “sweet potato casserole” with mini-marshmallows on top.)
If you could meet a historical figure, who would it be and why?
I was very excited to see the new film Napoleon, directed by Ridley Scott and starring Joaquin Phoenix, because of my upcoming trip to France. We went on opening night.
Sadly, it’s not a good film. I’m sure it had a huge budget, but it just doesn’t work. My husband and I both fell asleep in different parts. It’s really boring, even with all those battles. I’m not sure what Phoenix was going for in his portrayal, but he comes off as a strange, quiet, boring creep.
The two most exciting scenes are when Marie Antoinette goes to the guillotine and when the soldiers at the Battle of Austerlitz fall through the ice.
Based on the film, I’d rather go back and meet Marie Antoinette, the last Queen of France. I’d want to meet her during the fun Versailles years — you know, before they turned on her.
Do you trust your instincts?
Yes, I do tend to trust my instincts. I’m not one to sweep things under the rug. The downside of that is that I sometimes overreact to things.
I think parenting is one of those areas where it’s important to trust your instincts. If you think there’s something wrong with your pregnancy, baby, toddler, child, teenager, etc., you should act on it. It’s better to be wrong, than to let a real problem go unaddressed.
Listen to that little voice inside your head.
What’s your favorite month of the year? Why?
June is my favorite month. It’s my birthday month and summer begins, which is a big deal in New England. Technically, summer starts at the end of May, with Memorial Day weekend, but kids don’t get out of school until June, so that’s when it really starts. Also, the summer solstice (the longest day) is on June 20, 21 or 22.
When we were kids, every girl knew her “birthstone.” I’m not sure how that got started, but it contributed to your feelings (good or bad) about your birth month. In my opinion, February has the coolest birthstone: amethyst. April gets diamond (which is actually a little boring). Other good ones are May (emerald), July (ruby) and September (sapphire). June was wishy washy. Sometimes it got “pearl” (lame! and not even a stone), but it often got “Alexandrite.” (I’ve also seen moonstone as the June birthstone, which is also lame. Though beautiful, moonstone is semi-precious at best.)
Nobody is really sure what an Alexandrite is, but apparently real ones are quite rare, valuable, and change colors (from pink to purplish blue). As a girl, I was given a birthstone ring with a supposedly real Alexandrite. I once wore it on a jungle gym and it got stuck on a protruding screw (oh the 70s!) and bent out of shape. (I dangled by the ring for a moment, then dropped to the ground.) A jeweler bent it back into a circle for me and I still have it. Occasionally, I wear it.
So, I love June. I just want to know if my Alexandrite is real and if not, I’d like a real one please. Mine does change colors, which is cool.
What is your favorite place to go in your city?
Boston’s Back Bay neighborhood, particularly the Commonwealth Avenue mall, is my favorite part of the city. I worked in this neighborhood my entire career, starting with my first job after college at The Institute of Contemporary Art, when it was on Boylston Street.
Back Bay is so beautiful and so historic. Many movie scenes have been shot here. I’ve seen several of them underway over the years, with my closest brush with fame being a glimpse of Benedict Cumberbatch. He was shooting a scene for Black Mass at the Harvard Club. Cumberbatch played Billy Bulger, the brother of Boston’s most famous mobster — Whitey Bulger. I saw the film, but can’t remember if he got the accent right. They rarely do!
What’s the first impression you want to give people?
Like many Americans, I’m a smiler. I was fortunate to have had braces (twice!), so my teeth are straight. I’m not embarrassed to smile. I try to smile, even if I’m about to go full “Karen” and ask to speak to the manager. It can’t hurt, right?
The exception is obviously anytime I don’t want someone to engage with me. For women especially, this can be a safety issue. No, dude, this seat is not free. Can’t you see my coat is on it? Go sit somewhere else. (No smile for you)
When I was in the Soviet Union in the late 80s, I was shocked that nobody ever smiled out on the streets. It seemed so unfriendly. But then I got a look at their teeth. I wouldn’t smile either, if I had their teeth.
If you like smiling, thank your mother (who probably made you brush your teeth) and your father (who probably paid for your braces) and your dentist.
What book are you reading right now?
I’m about to start reading my book group’s selection for this month: Such Kindness by Andre Dubus III, a local author. He wrote the award-winning 1999 novel House of Sand and Fog, which I read for book group years ago.
One of the HUGE benefits of both Covid and Facebook is that I reconnected with my old wonderful book group from when I lived in my prior home in a different Massachusetts town. We were there from 1995 – 2004 and my book club was one of the absolute highlights of that time period in my life. I love these women.
We started meeting again, via Zoom, last year and I’m thrilled. We have one member who lives abroad so we typically meet at noon on Zoom (6pm her time).
My motivation to read is back, because I know I’m going to have a great discussion with a group of smart, thoughtful, insightful, amazing women.
The first line of Such Kindness is:
“OUR GOOD SAMARITAN DRIVES US THROUGH SOFTLY FALLING snow under streetlamps that have come on early.”
Hmmm…sounds interesting. I’m already picturing New England. The author lives about 30 minutes away from me and teaches at our local university, so I’m assuming some of the New England characters will resonate.
Today was hard. It was Friday of my last real week at work. Word has been slowly leaking out and tonight I got a call shortly after 5pm from a number I didn’t recognize. It was the Executive Director of the legacy (pre-merger) organization calling to say that he is “devastated” that I’m leaving. He said I’d done amazing work over the past 18 years and left a lasting legacy at the organization. He wanted to know the details of why I’d resigned, so I told him. He was really upset. I cried. We didn’t linger on that too long, because he really just wanted to thank me – very sincerely. I truly appreciated his call.
Related posts:
Contemplating early retirement
It’s great to be done with Danielle
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
I think I’ll stay in Massachusetts. It’s such a boring answer, but with the world the way it is, I really wouldn’t want to risk any other state or country. The long cold winters are a big problem for me, but you can always jump on a plane to someplace warm.
Top 5 things about Massachusetts:
We have many beaches — from Salisbury to Westport, plus Cape Cod and the islands of Martha’s Vineyard and Nantucket
We have mountains — the Berkshires are a magical region loaded with world class cultural organizations like Tanglewood and Jacob’s Pillow
We have Boston — it ain’t NYC, but it’s a real city with an international airport and several wonderful art museums
Most of the people I love and care about live here.
Politics: we were the first state to legalize same sex marriage and pass universal healthcare. We guarantee women’s reproductive freedom and have restrictive gun laws (although loopholes still exist). Trump lost every single Massachusetts county in the 2020 election.
People call us “Massholes,” but that’s just because they don’t know how to fuckin’ drive.
What’s the coolest thing you’ve ever found (and kept)?
At work last summer, I found my entire teams’ salaries (including mine) in the office printer. They were just sitting there — for hours — before I finally looked to see what they were.
I kept the paper for future reference.
Knowing that I was underpaid in relation to some less experienced colleagues made my decision to resign this week a bit easier.
I’m pretty sure this is a GenX and older problem. Nobody younger than 40 would ever print out a sheet of salaries — or really anything for that matter.
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